As Mother’s Day approaches, I wanted to go back and take a look at how I adapted to the role I was about to take on, the role of Mom. This post makes me remember all the feelings that I was having and how they all came around full circle.
35 Weeks – Baby Brain Is A Strange Thing
I’m spending the remainder of my 34th and the beginning of my 35th week in Indianapolis implementing a new software system for a pharmacy site full of people that are excited to receive it. I realize when I come on site how much I enjoy my job. Is it stressful? Yes. Do I have a lot of responsibility? Yes. But when I walk around this building and realize that everyone here is looking to me for answers, it motivates you to want to be there for them, to know everything there is to know and calm their nerves. Do I know it all? No but I learn.
There was a time early on in my pregnancy where I wished maybe I could stay home with him, not necessarily full time but maybe part time. There was a time where I felt like because that wasn’t an option for our family that I was somehow being cheated but I realize that isn’t at all what I want. So much of who I am is my need to contribute in the ways that I do everyday at work. Without that, I’m not me.
Up until this point in my life, my priorities have been family, career and the ever present need to compete and challenge myself. What I’m starting to realize is that this little guy in my belly is going to add a entirely new dimension to all those things.
Pregnancy is amazing. It’s not just about the development of a child. It’s about the development of a mom. I’ve come a long way in 8 months. I’ve gone through every phase imaginable and it was painful at times, extremely. But I’m there. (It’s like that StateFarm Commercial). I’m ready for the role of “Mom”, maybe not all the sleepless nights. Am I still selfish? Yes and always will be to some degree and I think you have to be. We will find a balance, we will have to. Because for me, being a good mom for my son is about being the best person I can be and that includes, working hard and playing hard and being satisfied.