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I Think I Figured It Out

August 19, 2013 21 Comments

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You know that feeling that sometimes sets in after you’ve accomplished a goal you’ve been working towards for a long time?  It can sometimes feel like, dare I say it, depression?

Well, I think I figured out that must be what’s going on with me.  Graduate school was two long years oh and by they way, somewhere in there I lost one of the people who was so instrumental in pushing me to get there and then stay there.

So when I graduated, I think I lost just one of those connections I still had with him.  I lost a little piece of him.  He slipped a little further away.

Not to mention school took up a LOT of time and added to everything else, it provided a much needed distraction during a very difficult time.  I think what I’m starting to realize is that I’m not “over” the loss of my dad.  I guess I won’t ever really be.  The past two weekends have been exceptionally  hard.  He would’ve been so proud to see me graduate and he would’ve been even prouder to watch all 6 of his grandchildren playing together (3 of which he never got a chance to meet).  It’s crazy that such joyous moments can bring pain.

I’ll pull out of this funk, I think.  No, I know.  But I would be lying if I told you everything is cookies and rainbows right now. 

Thanks for listening…

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Comments

  1. MIZ says

    August 19, 2013 at 2:26 pm

    nothing but big huge I GET THIS I GET THIS hugs flowing your way from California.

    xo

    Carla

    Reply
    • Katie McFarland says

      August 20, 2013 at 3:13 am

      Thanks for the hugs! That means alot.

      Reply
  2. Nicole Goodman says

    August 19, 2013 at 3:04 pm

    Hang in there! Sending virtual hugs your way.

    Reply
    • Katie McFarland says

      August 20, 2013 at 3:14 am

      Thank you Nicole!

      Reply
  3. misszippy says

    August 19, 2013 at 3:25 pm

    Awww…totally normal reaction, I’m sure. Big hug to you!

    Reply
    • Katie McFarland says

      August 20, 2013 at 3:14 am

      Thanks Amanda! 🙂

      Reply
  4. Teamarcia says

    August 19, 2013 at 3:35 pm

    Big, big hugs my friend.

    Reply
    • Katie McFarland says

      August 20, 2013 at 3:14 am

      Thank you.

      Reply
  5. Michelle says

    August 19, 2013 at 4:44 pm

    I am right there with you on the funk. I’m sure your postpartum hormones aren’t helping you either. Hang in there!!

    Reply
    • Katie McFarland says

      August 20, 2013 at 3:15 am

      Thanks Michelle. You’re so right about the hormones. It’s like a crazy womnan’s cocktail.

      Reply
  6. Ali K. says

    August 19, 2013 at 8:09 pm

    I get such bad post-race depression…I think it definitely could apply to the rush of adrenaline as grad school ends! I hope you feel better soon!! It’ll pass!

    Reply
    • Katie McFarland says

      August 20, 2013 at 3:16 am

      Thanks Ali!

      Reply
  7. Laura @ Mommy run fast says

    August 19, 2013 at 10:45 pm

    Oh, hang in there, Katie!! You’ve had some MAJOR life events in the last year, and it’s natural to have a slump after a huge highlight (like birth and graduation!) Hope you start to feel better soon.

    Reply
    • Katie McFarland says

      August 20, 2013 at 3:16 am

      Thanks Laura!

      Reply
  8. Angela @ Happy Fit Mama says

    August 20, 2013 at 12:02 am

    Big hugs Katie! Things WILL get better. I know this.

    Reply
    • Katie McFarland says

      August 20, 2013 at 3:17 am

      Thanks! Your optimism is comforting!

      Reply
  9. Nicole Hart says

    August 20, 2013 at 1:17 am

    I lost my mom unexpectedly when I was a few weeks pregnant with my first child 13 years ago. I still mourn the loss. Every birthday, every special occasion, every good and bad “Mom” moments I have. Hang in there. I know it can be really difficult.

    Reply
    • Katie McFarland says

      August 20, 2013 at 3:17 am

      I’m so sorry for your loss. It helps to know you’re not alone.

      Reply
  10. Kierston @candyfit says

    August 20, 2013 at 10:51 am

    xoxox

    Reply
  11. Kate Nesi says

    August 21, 2013 at 2:02 pm

    I lost my dad over 5 years ago and he passed one month before his first grandchild. With 5 total this year, it makes me miss him and wish he could have been there for it all. I completely understand how you feel, as I go through those moments (especially when something big happens) and feel down. I always try to remember, not only is he now there to see the awesome times, he is helping me through on the other side get through the tough times. He’s with you, always, and smiling and playing with those babes in their sleep. Thanks for sharing and writing your blog, I have been reading for months but don’t comment often.

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. Mommy and Me Update: 6 and a half years later | Moms Little Running Buddy says:
    January 29, 2017 at 10:52 pm

    […] My journey was different that many.  In that I wasn’t looking to be a mom and I went through depression BEFORE he ever came into my world.  I just didn’t have any idea what life would be like and […]

    Reply

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